June 3rd Fast

 +JMJ

"Once understood, it seemed so simple. I was amazed it had taken me so long in terms of time and suffering to learn this truth. Of course we believe we depend on God, that his will sustains us in every moment of our life. But we are afraid to put it to the test. There remains deep down in each of us a little nagging doubt, a little knot of fear that we refuse to face or admit even to ourselves, that say, 'Suppose it isn't so.' We are afraid to abandon ourselves totally in God's hands for fear he will not catch us if we fall. 

It is the ultimate criterion, the final test of all faith and all belief, and it is present in each of us, lurking unvoiced in a closet of our mind we are afraid to open. It is not really a question of trust in God at all, for we want very much to trust him; it is really a question of our ultimate belief in his existence and his providence, and it demands the purest act of faith."

(Father Walter J. Ciszek, S.J.)

     Modern man is conditioned to not only know his outcomes but control them as well.  Unfortunately, when the outcome can so easily be controlled there is no need for trust, even on the simplest level, and so when a situation demands even a modicum of faith, man quickly retreats, preferring comfort to courage, safety to self surrender.  

As Christ yearns to unite, the devil devises to divide.  His ultimate goal is to erode the foundation of one's relationship with God by sowing seeds of suspicion and distrust; consequently the soul exchanges his confidence and peace for fear and anxiety.  The sundry of sin that originated in Eden first came from Eve's distrust of God's providence, her fear of His will, and ultimately her doubt of His love. 

It is this doubt of God's love that has plagued man ever since.  It is this doubt that prompted Our Lord to appear to St. Margaret Mary and reveal His Sacred Heart, reminding man of His intense love for him.  It is this mistrust of God's divine providence that moved Christ to appear to Saint Faustina, imploring man to place his trust in Him. 

Satan encourages man to think of God as distant and indifferent, an omnipotent but abstract being.  But Our dear Savior is not an abstract idea but a real person, flesh and blood, full of passionate love for the flock He lays His life down for.  The statues of Christ in Church do not invite man to worship cold stone, but rather remind the soul that what he worships is a real man, who walked this earth, who is alive in the Holy Eucharist, who aches for our love.  But he does not want a love that is conditioned and calculated, for that is not love at all, only a cowardly tepidity that dismays and disgusts him.  He begs for a love that is free of anxiety but full of trust; he invites man to relinquish his fears.  He asks,"Do you have the strength to believe in my providential care? Do you truly believe that I love you?" And so, in times of doubt, say this simple prayer over and over again, Jesus I trust in you. 

May 6th Fast

 +JMJ

"My soul magnifies the Lord, 

 and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, 

for He has regarded the low estate of His handmaiden. 

For behold, henceforth all generations will call me blessed; 

for He who is mighty has done great things for me and holy is His name. 

And his mercy is on those who fear Him from generation to generation.  

He has shown strength in His arm,  

He has scattered the proud in the imagination of their hearts, 

He has put down the mighty from their thrones, 

And has exalted those of low degree; 

He has filled the hungry with good things, And the rich Has has sent empty away. 

He has helped His servant Israel, in remembrance of His mercy, as He spoke to our fathers, to Abraham and to his posterity for ever. 

(Lk. 1:46-55)

Among the many benefits that classic literature affords is a study of human nature which is revealed by perceptive authors who portray their characters in a fashion which transcends the era in which they live. Elinor Dashwood, one of the protagonists in Jane Austen's novel Sense and Sensibility, is frequently plagued by a troublesome companion, Lucy Steele.  The latter young woman imposes a trust upon the elder Miss Dashwood when she purposely reveals a secret engagement to the former's love interest, Edward Ferrars.  Assuming Elinor's attachment to her fiance, Lucy consistently strives to cultivate feelings of jealousy in the other; feigning friendship while conspicuously emphasizing her superior position to Elinor.  Miss Dashwood courageously refuses to indulge Lucy; pitying Edward for his evidently immature decision as a youth, rather than questioning her own merit as a worthy companion.

In one's journey to holiness he is frequently assailed by temptations, not the least of which is jealousy. Sometimes temptations to this vice arise from the devil sowing seeds of insecurity; at other times, the soul is enticed to the inverse, as envy drives him to willfully excite jealous feelings in another person who he imagines to be his competitor. 

Trapped in a jealous mindset a soul forgets that the race he is competing in is against himself, not against others.  Unfortunately the present culture only encourages this competitive spirit as the majority engages in an endless spewing of personal information— accomplishments, experiences, relationships, opinions, etc.— that consciously or unconsciously broadcasts their superiority. This tendency is not only found in secular society but frequently occurs in the Christian community when the holy desire to reform is distorted into the perverse desire to perform.  Does one keep in mind that in his excitement to highlight his advances, he may be also accentuating his neighbor's shortcomings?

The saints recognize that the road to perfection consists in the daily acceptance of God's will. Peace is attained when one's will and spiritual practices are attuned to his vocation and ability. The truly humble soul can never be jealous because he acknowledges that there has been and will always be someone smarter, prettier, wealthier, wittier, holier, etc. Confident that God knows of his capability, the saint is secure in the knowledge that sanctity lies in the many daily fidelities he practices in his vocation.  The jealous soul is hardened against His Maker; refusing to be grateful for how he has been made and what he has been given. But a soul at peace rejoices in his littleness and truly says with the Pslamist:

"For it was You who formed my inward parts; You knit me in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made." (Ps. 139: 13-14)

April 1st Fast

 +JMJ

"After this, Jesus, knowing that all was now finished said (to fulfill the scripture), 'I thirst,' A bowl full of vinegar stood there; so they put a sponge full of the vinegar on hyssop and held it to his mouth. When Jesus had received the vinegar, he said,'It is finished'; and he bowed his head and gave up his spirit." (Jn. 19:28-30)

 St. Teresa of Kolkata famously said,"I know that God will not give me anything I cannot handle. I just wish He would not trust me so much." How often in life does one echo these words in his heart? How often does he pray for the strength to endure seemingly endless tests of patience? How frequently does he sympathize with another famous Teresian quip (this time from the great saint of Avila):"If this is how you treat your friends, no wonder you have so few of them?"  

If one thing is certain about the Royal Road of the Cross it is that it is not a short one.  It is understood that God could have redeemed the world in any way He chose; one drop of Christ's blood would have been sufficient to pay our ransom. And yet, Our Savior chose to fill his cup of suffering up to the very brim. His mental anguish in Gethsemane was not enough; his betrayal by his one apostle and abandonment by his other apostles was not enough; his scourging and crowning with thorns was not enough. How his body, his human nature, must have ached to stay on the ground after each fall on the way to Calvary! Oh, surely He must have yearned to die in the arms of His beloved mother as she sorrowfully met Him on the Via Dolorosa.  

But it was not until His strength had been completely emptied that Christ breathed His last on Good Friday. For having poured out His sacrificial love as a ransom for sinners, He now cries out for that same love in the words,"I thirst". The love that satisfies is not one that is given in a burst of affection, or a brief moment of self-denial.  This love that the Greeks called "agape" is one that demands the total gift of self. One who strives to practice it does not say,"the burden is too heavy, the time is too long, the cross is too much." He may beg for assistance, but is prepared to persevere, plodding along steadily, rising when he falls, determined to shoulder the weight until the Lord may say to him:"It is enough."

March 4th Fast

 +JMJ

"'I will arise and go to my father, and I will say to him,'Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son; treat me as one of your hired servants.' And he arose and came to his father. But while he was yet at a distance, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. And the son said to him,'Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son.' But the father said to his servants,'Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring in his hand, and shoes on his feet; and bring the fatted calf and kill it, and let us eat and be merry; for this my son was dead and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.'" (Lk. 15:21-24)

In Willa Cather's novel, Death Comes for the Archbishop, the bishop and his assistant come upon a ramshackle pueblo, during one of their missionary journeys.  The occupants of the hovel are a loathsome man and his timid, native wife, who silently communicates to the travelers that they are in danger, wordlessly imploring them to make haste in their departure.  After the clerics successfully flee to the nearest village, the woman, aptly named Magdelena, manages to escape her abusive husband, subsequently pouring forth her wretched story to the two missionaries.  

Enticed by the prospect of marrying a wealthy American, Magdelena entered into a bond with a man who she soon discovered to be a murderous and cruel knave.  She suffered in darkness until she was given hope by the solicitous gaze of the bishop; the look of love that came from Christ. This hope prompted her to flee, despite the danger if she were caught.  After her husband is apprehended and justly punished for his crimes, the bishop places Magdelena in the convent of the Sisters of Loretto, where she lives as a servant. As Cather writes,

"She was devoted to the nuns, and so happy in the service of the Church that when the Bishop visited the school he used to enter by the kitchen-garden in order to see her serene and handsome face. . . After the blight of her horrible youth was over, she seemed to bloom again in the household of God."

As Lent begins, the Church reminds her children that they are not made for this world but for the next.  Detaching from the material (even legitimate) goods of this world facilitates a greater attachment and appreciation for the goods of the next world, our everlasting home.  By foregoing this world's pleasures, one is given the opportunity to cultivate a spirit of gratitude for even the simple and mundane.  He does not look upon his work as a drudgery that must be endured, but a task that he is privileged to undertake.  Suffering and self-denial can either produce resentment and anger for the loss of goods one imagines he deserves or acceptance and gratitude for the necessities too often overlooked. Disillusioned and bruised by the lure of a comfortable life, Magdelena finds healing in the security of service to God.  No longer desiring riches that cannot satisfy, she finds contentment in the abundance of graces showered upon her as she embraces her life of humble servitude.  Like the Psalmist, she may cry out:

"Let me dwell in your tent forever! Oh, to be safe under the shelter of your wings!" (Ps. 61:4)

February 4th Fast

+

JMJ

"None of us can be the master of our own soul in a short time or hold it firmly in our grasp from our very first steps. We should be content to gain small victories over our most unruly passions from time to tome. We must bear with others, but first of all we must exercise forbearance toward ourselves and be patient with our own lack of perfection. Is it right for us to want to have interior peace without having first passed through the ordinary struggles of life?

Keep up the following practices. In the morning, prepare your soul to be at peace. Take care throughout the day to remember that resolution and to reaffirm it.  Should you become disturbed, do not lose heart and do not be pained by it, but having recognized the situation calmly humble yourself before God and attempt to restore your mind to peace.  Say to your soul,"Now friend, we have made a misstep, let us proceed more carefully." And each time you fall, do the same thing. When you are at peace, make good use of the time, making as many acts of humility as you can, however insignificant they may be. For as Our Lord says, he who is faithful in little things will have great ones entrusted to him. Above all, do not lose your courage, but be patient, watchful, and ready with a spirit of compassion. God will hold you in his hand, and if he lets you stumble, it will be only so that you realize that you would collapse entirely if he did not hold you up, and thus make you tighten your grip upon his hand."

St. Francis de Sales