November 3rd Fast

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JMJ

"I beg you to see to it that those meditations of man's last four ends finish up with hope and trust in God, not with fear and fright. . . When they finish in fear, they are dangerous. . . God is not so terrible for those who love Him. . . He asks little of us because He knows how little we have." (St. Francis deSales) 

In the classic novel, Anna Karenina, a poignant scene is depicted between Kitty, the young newly married wife of Levin, and his dying brother, Nikolay. Knowing of her brother-in-law's decline and approaching death, Kitty has been pleading with her husband to allow her to call upon him before his impending end.  For a time, Levin refuses to permit this visitation out of concern that the sight of his wretched brother and the repugnant surroundings of his living situation would repulse his young bride, thereby defiling her sweet innocence. However, once Levin finally accedes to her persistent determination, he is astounded to discover that his sweet spouse is not as naive and timid as he thought. Not only is she undisturbed by the loathsome scene she encounters, but Kitty is actually unhindered by the fear of death that plagues Levin:

 "[She] knew without a shadow of a doubt what life was, and what death was, and although [she couldn't] have begun to answer or even understand questions which occured to Levin, [there] was no doubt to the significance of this phenomenon. . .the proof that [she] really did know what death was lay in the fact that [she] knew without a moment's hesitation how to deal with people who were dying and [was] not frightened of them. Levin and others, although they could say a lot about death, clearly did not know, because they were afraid of death and did not have the faintest idea what to do when people were dying."

Since the Fall, when sin and suffering entered the world, death has been an ever present reality to man. Though he may choose to ignore it—through laziness, a bloated over-confidence, or an idolization of health—man cannot escape mortality. But rather than being frustrated at his finiteness—a feeling that emanates from the pride that he is profoundly capable of anything—if man accepts the limitations that accompany his mortality, he will secure the serenity that Our Savior offers to those who live in union with his will. 

Though it may at first be humbling to acknowledge those limitations—both physical and emotional—in the end, it is a relief to rest in the fact that one need not strive for a perfect existence that is not in harmony with a nature that cries for respite from the unrealistic demands he puts upon himself. Christ desires this freedom for his followers when he offers to yoke himself to man.  No longer burdened by expectation, man is at peace, happily admitting to his weaknesses and gladly depending on God to make up for what is lacking.

October 6th Fast

+JMJ 

"The Rosary is a powerful weapon to put the demons to flight and to keep oneself from sin…If you desire peace in your hearts, in your homes, and in your country, assemble each evening to recite the Rosary. Let not even one day pass without saying it, no matter how burdened you may be with many cares and labors.” – Pope Pius XI

Man yearns for rest. One naturally desires for a life unencumbered by obstacles that disturb his quest for a soul at peace and so decries circumstances which upset this worthy goal and ideal.  When impediments arise, as they inevitably do, he resentfully blames uncontrollable situations or people for his restlessness, refusing to adapt and accept, choosing instead to begrudge and reject.  This spirit not only plants the weeds of ingratitude but furthermore, it drives away the peaceful security which resides in a soul who trusts in the providence of God. 

One frustrated by encumbrances, fails to understand that His Father has allowed these challenges to edify him not thwart him. It is not by happenstance that one is placed in a certain time and circumstance. When Esther bewailed her fate to confront the King unannounced at the peril of her life, her uncle Mordecai responded," Who knows that you have come to the kingdom for such a time as place?" (Esther 4:14) Like the Israelites in the desert who grumble and lament their liberty, the restive soul is narrowly focused on the burden of the journey, rather than perceiving the grace he has been given to pursue his goal.

Idyllic circumstances will rarely present themselves, and so man must resign himself to whatever situation is providentially afforded him, acknowledging obstacles but courageously refusing to be weighed down by them. The daily recitation of the rosary provides a beautiful example of this challenge. For it is a calling to fidelity, not flawlessness. The commitment to the rosary requires patience, and constancy even on very difficult days. It is in persevering in this daily discipline— calmly plodding through the hindrances that tempt him away from the devotion— one can understand that peace can be obtained not through perfection but through patience.

September 1st Fast

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"We put pride into everything like salt. We like to see that our good works are known. If our virtues are seen, we are pleased; if our faults are perceived, we are sad. I remark that in a great many people; if one says anything to them, it disturbs them, it annoys them. The saints were not like that – they were vexed if their virtues were known, and pleased that their imperfections should be seen." (St. John Vianney)

St. Catherine Laboure received many mystical graces—apparitions of Our Lady, prophetic visions of France's future, locutions from the Holy Spirit— but perhaps the most extraordinary grace she received was the gift of a hidden life.  Our Compassionate Mother shielded her servant from the world's eye, allowing this Sister 0f Charity the privilege of a peaceful existence. 

Yet, Sister Catherine cooperated with this invitation by humbly and gratefully accepting anonymity. How providential that her surname originates from the Latin root "to work"—laborare— for truly she led a life filled with drudgeries of the natural sort. Yet this ordinary life rose to supernatural heights— not owing to the miraculous occurrences that accompanied her years on earth— but as a direct consequence of the selfless love she poured forth in performing her duties without the desire of praise or attention. 

The call of each vocation is the total gift of self; yet that gift must be given without pretension or complaint. Sacrifices acquire their nobility not when they are exposed but when they are concealed.  For humility, the noblest of virtues, is attained through the most ignoblest of means: humiliations. The sincerely humble is eager for service and indifferent to notice. He serves the needs of others, not the needs of his ego. Not easily offended by others' seeming ingratitude, he is satisfied in the knowledge that his beloved is content. The hidden life of self-denial and daily service is one of heroic virtue, sought by a courageous few who accept the command of greatness in a life of littleness:

 "But not so with you, rather, let the greatest among you become as the youngest, and the leader as the one who serves. For which is the greater, one who sits at table, or the one who serves? Is it not the one who sits at table? But I am among you as one who serves." (Lk. 22:26-27)

 

 

August 4th Fast

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“The obligation we have to love our neighbor is so important that Jesus Christ put it into a Commandment that he placed immediately after that by which he commands us to love Him with all our hearts. He tells us that all the law and the prophets are included in this commandment to love our neighbor. Yes, my dear brethren, we must regard this obligation as the most universal, the most necessary and the most essential to religion and to our salvation. In fulfilling this Commandment, we are fulfilling all the others.” (St. John Vianney)

 How easy it is to give of one's resources to a worthy cause or even to present a gift to another who bestows lavish praise for one's thoughtfulness. How much more difficult to have peace with familial or fraternal relations? A material donation may require a single sacrifice while the gift of energy, emotions, time, etc. demands continuous self-denial, that refuses to tally any mounting costs.

The devil cannot endure tranquility and communion and so he uses various means to sow tension and discord. Subtly he tempts one to focus on trivialities, amplifying the weaknesses of the other while purposely obscuring and minimizing his strengths. All the while, he assuages the ego of his listener, magnifying the injuries he has received, cunningly whispering,"See how selfish that other person is! How he clings to his will while he ignores how often you have yielded so generously!"

In the midst of this inner dialogue—as one proudly trumps his own imagined magnanimity, and laments the other's perceived petulancy— does he ever stop to consider how the Evil One relishes this triumph of his? As he allows the devil to further divide him from a loved one, does he realize how his pride and resentment have so blinded him that he can see nothing but his own narrow view of endured injustices?

There are very real and painful deep wounds that exist in personal relationships, but there are also many cuts that may appear deep but are really only superficial, though irksome. Living in communion involves great sacrifice but also creates an opportunity for immense gratitude. It requires setting aside pride in order to obtain peace but also prompts one to reflect not just on what he has given up, but what he has gained. Christ invites man to rejoice in the good of the other, while excusing his faults; to accept his weakness, and praise his strength.

"Dear Sacred Heart of Jesus, we renew our pledge of love and loyalty to you. Keep us always close to Your Loving Heart and to the Most Pure Heart of Your Mother. May we love one another more and more each day, forgiving each other's faults as you forgive us our sins. Teach us to see you in the members of our family and those we meet outside our home and to love them as you love them, especially the poor and the oppressed, that we may be instrumental in bringing about justice and peace."

 

July 7th Fast

 +JMJ

“There are many persons very dear to my Heart, but the moment I saw this blessed sun this Morning (with Kit  in my arms) dear Rebecca came at once in my thoughts, and if there had been a wish to name, it would have been to have you with me. .. You well know how much I value your Society and affection but we are not always to have what we like best in this world, thank Heaven! For if we had, how soon we should forget the other ,-the place of endless Peace, where they who were united by Virtue and affection here, will surely enjoy that union so often interrupted while on their journey Home.” 

(St. Elizabeth Ann Seton writing to her sister-in-law and dear friend, Rebecca Seton)

There has been much focus on how the current culture devalues the love of a man and woman, but a still greater depreciation has been the false idea of the love of friends. This latter is the more significant travesty because friendship is the basis of the strong marriage and a close relationship with Our Dear Lord.

A good friend, is not just someone who is seen often or whose circumstances are a reflection of one's own. Though it is common to meet a close friend through shared experiences, this does not comprise the entirety of the relationship. According to Aristotle in Book VIII of his Nichomachean Ethics:

"Perfect friendship is the friendship of men who are good, and alike in virtue; for these wish well alike to each other. . .now those who wish well to their friends for their sake are mostly true friends; for they do this by reason of own nature and not incidentally; therefore their friendship lasts as long as they are good—and goodness is an enduring thing." 

This type of friendship is unusual because of the high demands it places on man's character. Even Aristotle pessimistically admitted that it is "natural that such friendships should be infrequent; for such men are rare." A close friendship requires discernment, vulnerability, sacrifice and patience.

Discernment is vital to determine if the fellowship of the other is enjoyable and edifying. Longing for love and attachment, it is tempting to settle for less worthy companions just for the sake of avoiding solitude. Yet friendship depends on the confident independence of each and will never thrive if one party is insecure, possessive or manipulative. Prudence will be rewarded to those who patiently wait to find friends that lighten the heart with a joyful spirit and strengthen the will by a virtuous example.

Forming strong friendships requires vulnerability, which must begin with intentionality. One must bravely seek out others, despite the fear of rejection.  Our Lord commanded his disciples to go out into the world, not to shore up in a hole and hope someone would find them.  

Now, being vulnerable does not mean being imprudently impulsive. Sharing too much and too soon often leads to regret. Yet two can never hope to be equals if only one unlocks his door while the other firmly leaves his barred. Otherwise, insecurity and superiority replace empathy and consolation. The word vulnerable comes from the Latin root,"vulnus" meaning wound. Like an open wound which is grafted upon to create a new and stronger foundation, only a friendship that allows for an openness of heart, a humility of spirit and a willingness to mature, can blossom and grow firm through this grafting of hearts.

Finally, true Christian friendship necessitates sacrifice and patience. The Greek legend of Damon and Pythias illustrates the supreme love of friends when Damon offers to take the condemned place of Pythias so that he can visit his family one last time. When Pythias is considerably delayed Damon is prepared to suffer execution, firmly believing in his friend's fidelity despite Pythias' absence and the subsequent mockery he endures from the cruel Dionysius. At the final moment, Pythias appears and the dictator is so moved that he allows both to be freed.

At first glance, this story appears to highlight the ultimate sacrifice a friend is willing to make, but in truth, it depicts the constancy of a friend who patiently bears another's burden, faithfully sacrificing his freedom for the other.  Sacrificial love in a friendship practices intentional charity that is not convenient or comfortable. Self-interest, envy, judgment and defensiveness are set aside with a discarded ego. In forgetting himself, one discovers the joy of knowing the goodness of the other.  It is a tremendous gift to know and feel the genuine and abiding love and affection of a true sister or brother in Christ. A friendship that is founded and derives its strength from the Source of love, a friendship that seeks to return to that Love, is one of inestimable value.

A faithful friend is a sturdy shelter:

    he that has found one has found a treasure.

15 

There is nothing so precious as a faithful friend,

    and no scales can measure his excellence.

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A faithful friend is an elixir of life;

    and those who fear the Lord will find him.

(Sirach 6:14-16)